Life has a way of shifting our priorities, reshaping who we are in ways we never expected.
Parenthood does that, and for me, autism amplified it. Ten fold. The woman I was years ago would barely recognize the person I’ve become today. But every now and then, something, or rather, someone, reminds me of the life I once led and the connections that have remained constant through it all.
I had one of those reminders on Friday night when I did something I never do. I went out. It was my bestie’s husband’s 50th surprise party. There are not a lot of people in this world that could get me out on a Friday night away from my daughter and out of my home but this lady in pink beside me she’s the real deal.
When I emerged into the world of autism, I was lost and alone, but she was by my side. She was with me when my daughter was born and she was with me when my daughter was diagnosed with severe nonverbal autism.
She’s the kind of friend that will support you but gently nudge you if you’re going in the wrong direction.
Many years ago in a different life, I was social. I was the life of the party. Now I avoid people and crowded places at all costs.
Truth be told, I couldn’t wait to leave. Not because I didn’t love the people that were there, but I felt very out of place. My daughter was awake and waiting for me. She Facetimed me. It adds a layer that is unexplainable to most.
But that’s a thing about lifelong friends: they’re there for you, no matter what, so it was important for me to be there for my friend that night. When you find the people that truly love and support you and your child, hang onto them with everything you’ve got.
Autism has changed me. It fundamentally changed me.
I’m not sure what our future holds, but what I do know is I will always have this loyal friend by my side, a constant source of strength and understanding in a world that can often feel overwhelming.
